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The Art of seduction: 24 laws of persuasion

Author: Greene, Robert Publisher: Viva Books, 2006.Language: EnglishDescription: 467 p. ; 24 cm.ISBN: 8176493244Type of document: BookBibliography/Index: Includes bibliographical references and index
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Book Asia Campus
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Print BF774 .G74 2006
(Browse shelf)
900182928
Available 900182928
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Includes bibliographical references and index

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Contents The Art of Seduction The Art of Seduction Ackmlegments Preface xix ix Part One The Seductive Character PW 1 The Siren page 5 A man is @en secretly oppressed by the role he has to play-by always having to be responsible, in control, and rational. The Siren is the ultimate malefantasyfigure because she oflers a total releasefrom the limitations of his I*. In her presence, which is always heightened and sexually charged, the malefeels transported to a realm of pure pleasure. In a world where women are often too timid to project such an image, learn to take control of the male libido by embodying hisfantasy. A woman never quitefeek desired and appreciated enough. She wants attention, but a man is he detoo @en distracted and unresponsive. n r e Rake ic a greatfemale/antmy-f;gur~~~hen sires a woman, brief though that moment may be, he will go to the ends of the earthfor her. He may be disloyal, dishonest, and antoral, but that only adds to his appeal. Stir a woman's repressed longings by adapting the Rake? mix 4 danger and pleasure. The Ideal Lover pase 29 Most people have dreams in their youth that get shattered or worn down with age. Theyfind thetnselves disappointed by people, events, reality, which cannot match their youthJirl ideals. Ideal Lovers thrive on people's broken dreams, which hecotne lijlongfantasies. You lotg for romance? Adventure? Lofty spiritual communion? The Ideal Lover refects your fantosy. He or she is an artist in creating the illusion you require. In a world of disenchantment and baseness, there is limitless seductive power inandllowing the path ofthe Ideal Lnver. The Dandy page 41 Most of usfeel trapped within the limited roles that the world expects us to play. We are instantly attracted to those who are morefluid than we are-those who create their own persona. Dandies excite us beawe they cannot be categorized, and hint at afreedom we wantfor ourselves. They play with masculinity and femininity; they faqhion their own physical image, which is always startling. Use the power 4 the Dandy to create an ambiguous, alluring presence that stirs repressed desires. The Ntrl page 53 aua Childhood is thegolden paradise we are always consciously or unconsciously trying to re-create. The Natural embodies the longed* qualities of childhoobspontaneity, sinceritx unpretentiousness. In the presence of Naturals, we feel at ease, caught up in their plalrful spirit, transported back to that golden age. Adopt the pose of the Natural to neutralize people's defensiveness and infect them with helpless delight. The Coquette page 67 The ability to delay satisfaction is the ultimate art 4 seduction--while waiting, the victim is held in thrall. Coquettes are the grand masters 4 the game, orchestrating a back-and-forth movement between hope and justration. They bait with the promise 4 rewontthe hope of physical pleasure, happiness, fame by association, power-all of which, however, proves elusive; yet this only makes their tagets pursue them the more. lmitate the alternating heat and coolness of the Coquette and you will keep the seduced at your heels. , The Charmer page 79 Charm is seduction without sex. Charmers are consummate manipulators, masking their clwemess by creating a mood ofpkasure and comfort. Their method is simple: They dgect attentionfrom thetnselws andfocus it on their taget. They understand your spirit, feel your pain, adapt to your moods. In the presence 4 a Charmer youfeel better about yourselJ Learn to cast the Charmer's spell by aiming at people's primary weaknesses: vanity and seg-esteem. The Charismatic pate 95 Charisma is a presence that excites us. It comesfiom an inner qualit~se~confidence, sexual .energy, sense ofpurpose, contentment-that most people lack and want. This quality radiates outward, permeating thegestures of Charismatics, making them seem extraordinary and superior. They learn to heighten their charisma with a piercing gaze, fiery oratory, an air 4 mystery. Create the charismatic illusion by radiating intensity while remaining detached. The Star pap 119 Daily I$ is harsh, and most of us constantly seek escapejom it infantasies and dreams. Stars feed on this weakness; standing outfrom others through a distinctive and appealing style, they make us want to watch them. A t the same time, they are wgue and ethereal, keeping their distance, and letting us imhgine more than is there. Their dreamlike quality works on our unconscious. Learn to become an object of fascination by projecting the-glittering but elusivepresence of the Star. The Anti-Seducer . pap UI draw you in by thejorused, individualized attention they pay to you. Anti-seducers a h opposite: insecure, self-absorbed, and unable tograsp the psychology of another person, t e I dy, literally repel. Anti-Seducers haw no self-awareness, and never realize when they are pming, imposing, talking too much. Root out anti-seductive qualities in yourselj and recog. nize them in othe-there is no pleasure or profit in dealing with the Anti-Seducer. The Seducer's Victims-The Eighteen Types page 147 Putnvo The Seductive Process page 161 1 Choose the Kight Victim page 167 Everything depends on the target o f your seduction. Study your prey thoroughly, and choose miy those who will prow susceptible to your charms. 7he right victims are thosefor whom you m f l l a mid, who see in you something exotic. They are ofien isolated or unhappy, or can wily be made s e f o r the completely contented person 8 almost impossible to seduce. The d e r t virtim has some quality that inspires strong emotions in you, making your seductive maneuvers seem more natural and dynamic. The perfect victim allowsfor the perfect chase. 2 Create a False Sense of Security-Approach Indirectly page 177 #you are too direct early on, you risk stirring up a resistance that will never be lowered. A t f i t t h m must be nothing 4 the seducer in your manner. The seduction should begin at an angle, indirectly, so that the target only gradually becomes aware o f you. Haunt the periphery ojyour target's I+--approach through a third party, or seem to cultivate a relatively neutral relationship, movinggraduallyfrom fiend to lover, Lull the targel intofeeling secure, then strike. 3 Send Mixed Signals page 185 OmP people are aware of your presente, and perhaps vaguely intrigued, you need to stir their andandrest before it settles on someone else. Most o f us are much too obvious--instead, be had to jigure out. Send mixed signals: both tough and tender, both spiritual and earthly, both innoa t and nmning. A mix of qualities suggests depth, whichfarn'nates even as it mnfuses. A n elusive, enigmatic aura will make people ivant to know more, drawing them into your circle. Create such a power by hinting at something contradictotory within you. 4 Appear to Be an Object of D e s i r d r e a t e Triangles pase 195 Few are drawn to the person whom others avoid or neglect; people gather around' those who have already attracted interest. T draw your victims closer and make them hungry to possess o pu, you must create an aura of desirability-of being wanted and courted by many. It will kwme a point o f vanity for them to be the prefened object of your attentian, to win you away a crowd 4 admirers. Build a reputation that precedes you: If many have succumbed to your charms, there must be a reason. 5 Create a Need-Stir Anxiety and Discontent 203 A perfectly satisfid penon cannot be seduced. Tension and disharmony must be instilled in your targets' minds. Stir within themjielings o f discontent, an unhappiness with their circumstances and with themselves. Thefeelings o f inadequacy that you create willgive you space to insinuate yourselj to make them see you as the answer to theirproblem. Pain and anxiety are the properprecurson to pleasure. Learn to manujacture the need that you canfill. 6 Master the Art of Insinuation page 211 Making your targetsfeel dissatirfied and in need o f your attention is essential, but f you are i too obvious, they will see through you and grow defensive. There is no known defense, however, against insinuation--the art ofplanting ideas in pcople's minds by dropping elusive hints that take root days later, even appearing to them as their own idea. Create a sublanguage-bold statementsfollowed by retraction and apology, ambiguous comnrents, banal talk combined with alluringglances-that entea the target's unconscious to convey your real meaning. Make everything suggestiw. 7 Enter Their Spirit page 219 Most people are locked in their own worlds, making them stubborn and hard to persuade. 7he way to lure them out o j their shell and set up your seduction is to enter their spirit. Hay by their rules, enjoy what they enjoy, adapt yourself to their moods. In doing so you will stroke their deep-rooted narcissism and lower their dt$enses. Indulge your targets' evny mood and whim, giving them nothing to r m against or resist. e 8 Create Temptation paxe 229 Lure the target deep into your seduction by creating the proper temptation: a glimpse o f the pleasures to come. As the serpent tempted Eve with the promise o f forbidden knowledge, you must awaken a desire in your targets that they cannot control. Find that weakness of theirs, thatfantasy that has yet to be realized, and hint that you can lead them toward it. 7he key i s to keep it vague. Stimulate a curiosity stronger than the doubts and anxieties that go with it, and they willfollow you. 9 Keep Them in Suspense-What Comes Next? page 241 .The moment peoplefeel they know what to expectjom you, your spell on them is broken. More: You haw ceded them power. The only way to lead the seduced along and keep the upper hand is to create suspense, a calculated surprise. Doing something they do not expectfrom you will give them a delightfir1 sense o f spontaneity-they will not be able to foresee what comes next. You are always one step ahead and in control. Give the victim a thrill with a sudden change of direction. 10 Use the Demonic Power of Words to Sow Confusion page 251 It is hard to make people listen; they are consumed with their own thoughts and desires, and have little timefor yours. The trick to making them listen is to say what they want to hear, to Jill their ears with whatever is pleasant to them. This is the essence of seductive language. Inj-lame peoplek emotions with loaded phrases, Jlattw them, comfort their insecurities, envelop them in sweet words and promises, and not only will they listen to you, they will lose their will to resist you. I 1 Pay Attention to Detail page 265 Lofp words of low and grand gestures can be suspicious: W h y are you trying so hard to please? The details 4 a seduction-the subtle gestum, the ofiand things you do-are often more charming and revealing. fiu must learn to distract your victims with a myriad ofpleasant little ritual~though@lg@ tailored just for them, clothes and adornments designed to please them, gestures that show the time and attention you are paying them. Mesmerized by what they see, they will not notice what you a a really up to. 12 Poeticize Your Presence page 277 Important things happen when your targets are abne: The slightestfeeling of relief that you aa not there, and it is all o m . Familiarity and ovemposure will cause this reaction. Remain elusive, then. Intrigue your targets by alternating an exciting presence with a cool distance, exuberant momentsfollowed by calculated absences. Associate yourselfwith poetic images and objects, so that when they think of you, they begin to see you through an idealized halo. The more youjgure in their minds, the more they will envelop you in seductivefantasies 13 Disarm Through Strategic Weaknebs and Vulnerability p a s 285 Too much maneuvering on your part may raise suspicion. 7 b e best way to cover your tracks is to make the othw person feel superior and stronger I f you seem to be weak, vulnerable, enthralled by the other penon, and unable to control yourseg you will make your actions look mom natural, less calculated: Physical weakness-tears, bashfirlness, paleness-will help create the eflect. Play the victim, then transform your target's sympathy into love. 14 Conhse Desire and Reality-The Perfect Illusion p a s 295 To compensatefor the d@mlties in their lives, people spend a lot of their time daydreaming, imagining afirturefirll of adventure, success, and romance. I f you can create the illusion that through you they can live out their dreams, you will have them at your meny. Aim at secret wishes that have been thwarted or repressed, stirring up uncontrollable emotions, clouding their powers o j reason. Lead the seduced to a point ofconfitsion in which they can no longer tell the dgerence between illusion and reality. 15 Isolate the Victim p a s 309 An isolated person is weak. By slowly isolating your victims, you make them more vulnerable to your influence. Take them awayfiom their normal milieu,ftiends,family, home. Give them Be sense of being marginalized, in limbo-they are leaving one world behind and enten'ng another: Once isolated like this, they have no outside support, and in their confKtion they are easily led astray. Lure the seduced into your lair, wherc nothing isfamiliar. 16 Prove Yourself page 321 Most people want to be seduced. I they resist your efforts, it is probably because you have not f gonefar enough to allay their doubts-about your motives, the depth of your feelings, and so on. One well-timed action that shows howfar you are willing to go to win them over will dispel their doubts. Do not worry about lookingfoolish or making a mistakeany kind o f deed that is $el/-samfin'ngand for your targets' sake will so ovenvhelm their emotions, they won? notice anything else. 17 Effect a Regression page 333 People who have experienced a certain kind o f pleasure in the past will try to repeat or relive it. rite deepest-rooted and most pleasumble memories are usually thosejom earliest childhood, and are ojien unconsciously associated with a parentalfigure. Bring your targets back to that point by placing yourseyin the oedipal triangle and positioning them as the needy child. Unaware of the cause of their emotional response, they willfall in love with you. 18 Stir Up the Transgressive and Taboo page 349 There are always social limits on what one can do. Some of these, the most elemental taboos, go back centuries; others are more superjcial, simply defining polite and acceptable behavior. Making your targetsfeel that you are leading them past either kind o f limit is immensely seductive. People yearn to explore their dark side. Once the desire to transgress draws p u r targets to you, it will be hard for them to stop Take them farther than they imagined-the shared/eeling ofguilt and complicity will create a powerful bond. 19 Use Spiritual Lures page 359 Everyone has doubts and insecurities-about their body, their sey-worth, their sexuality. If your seduction appeals exclusively to the physical, you will stir up these doubts and make your targets sefjconscious. Instead, lure them out of their insecurities by making them foncc on something sublime and spiritual: a religious experience, a lofty work of art, the occult. Lost in 'a spiritual mist, the targel willfeel light and uninhibited. Deepen the efed 4your seduction by making its sexual culmination seem like the spiritual union o f two souls. 20 Mix Pleasure with Pain page 369 Thegreatest mistake in seduction is being too nice. A t J n t , perhaps, your kindness is charming, but it soon grows monotonous; you are trying too hard to please, and seem insecure. Instead o f ownvhelming your t a p t s with niceness, try injicting some pain. Make them feel guilty and insecure. Instigate a breakup--now a rapprochement, a return to your earlier kindness, will turn them weak at the knees. 7'he l o w the lows you mate, the greater the highs. To heighten the erotic charge, create the excitement offeat 21 Give Them Space to Fall-The Pursuer Is Pursued page 383 If your targets become too used to you as the agpssor, they willgive less of their own energy, and the tension will slacken. You need to wake them up, turn the tables. Once they are under your spell, take a step back and they will start to come afiw you. Hint that you are growing bored. Seem interested in someone else. Soon they will want to possess you physically, and restraint willgo out the uindow. Create the illusion that the seducer is being seduced. 22 Use Physical Lures page 393 ' Targets with actractrve are dangerous: I f they see through your manipulations, they may minds suddenly develop doubts. Put their minds gently to rest, and waken their dormant senses, by combining a nondefensive attitude with a charged sexual presence. While your cool, nonchalant air ic lowring their inhibitions, your glances, voice, and bearing-oozing sex and d e s i m r e getting under their skin and raising their temperature. Neverfarce the physical; instead i.fand your targets with heat, lure them into lust. Moraliiy,judgment, and concernfor thefuture will all melt away. 23 Master the Art of the Bold Move page 405 A momenl has arrived: Your victim clearly desires you, but is not ready to admit it openly, let alone act on it. 7 l i s is the time to thnw aside chivalry, kindness, and coquetry and to overwhelm'with a bold move. Don't give the victim time to consider the consequences. Showing hesitation or awkwardness means you are thinkinx 4 yourseE as opposed to being overwhelmed by the victim's charms. One person must go on the offensive, and it is you. 24 Beware the Aftereffects page 415 Dangerfollows in the ajiemrath 4 a sumssful seduction. Ajer emotions have reached a pitch, they ofien swing in the opposite directio-twrd lassitude, distrust, disappointment. If you are to part, make the s m i e sunnuif)and sudden. I f you are to stay in a relationship, beware a 4 m e w , a creepingfamiliarity that will spoil thefantasy. A second seduction is required. Nvr let the other person take you fargranted-use absence, create pain and conjict, ee to kedp the seduced on tenterhooks. Appendix A: Seductive Environment/Seductive Time page 431 441 Appendix B: Soft Seduction: How to Sell Anything to the Masses page Selected Bibliography Index 457 455

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